Monday, January 11, 2010

A New Beginninng

Well 2010 is off to a very interesting start. I just got laid of from my job and before you gasp and offer apologies, I'm telling you now, it's okay! I'm okay. I promise! :o)
I actually think this might be a good thing for many reasons. To be honest, I was miserable at this job and I've been looking at other opportunities for a while now.
I was actually a little upset when I was let go, as anyone would be. The company is downsizing and as I told my bosses, I would be much more upset if my being let go was because of me. If the company is downsizing, then the company is downsizing. I respect the decision and I do think it's in their best interest. But at the end of the day, it doesn't matter what I think.
Even though I was told there was nothing I could do to avoid this, it still hurt. But then I callled my parents who both said "Congratulations!" Ha. So that made me feel better. Seriously though, this is kind of a relief and I feel like a huge weight has been lifted off my shoulders. That's weird to say given the economy and the fact that I now have no income. But I'm sorry, it's just the way I feel...today at least. Tomorrow, maybe not. But I'm gonna take this one day at a time.
I made no secret of being miserable at my job. And no, I'm not proud of myself for handling things the way I did. But I'm glad this decision was made for me. (I'm sure everyone in my life is thrilled that they don't have to listen to me complain anymore too! How embarrassing is it that I feel the need to say that? Ugh.)
Trust me, I pictured quitting and being fired for months. And months. I imagined how everything would happen and let me tell you, the actual scenario went much better in real life than it ever did in my head. And for that, I am extremely grateful and relieved.
My first day of unemployment, so far, has been very productive! I've filed for unemployment, I've applied to 20 jobs since Friday, I went to the chiropractor, I made some phone calls and I found the gumbo mix I've been on a mission to find since last week!
I think everything happens for a reason. And I've been looking to make a change in my life for a long time now. It's funny, I would buy a new outfit hoping it would make me feel better. I'd cook a new recipe hoping it would give me the satisfaction of doing something successful with my day. I spent days looking at new home decor thinking that if I changed something at home then maybe my attitude at work would change too. But I think maybe letting go of that job is the relief and change I need.
Today, I'm excited about making a positive change. I feel as lucky and blessed as I ever have. I'm excited for the future. (And I'm REALLY excited I can avoid the crowds at the gym and work out during the day!) Tomorrow I may be nervous and antsy and scared to death. But for now, I'm gonna embrace the change, use my time as wisely as I can and pray for the best.
I know there will be ups and downs. There always are. And it's not what happens to you, it's how you handle it. I know people are nervous for me and there are moments during the day I just stop and cry. (You'll probably read a post about that later this week when everything actually settles in.)
But I'm going to remain as positive as I can. And I want to use this time in my life to volunteer, find out what I really want to do and be smart about it. :o)
I hope ya'll have a fabulous night!

2 comments:

  1. Good luck with it all! As you know I've been there, enjoy the moments you can and keep working hard at finding what you want.

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  2. Lol don't take this the wrong way but you're my role model in this adventure! I'm trying to mimic what you did so I'm up around 7:30am everyday (except for today b/c I messed up and slept in by accident), I go to the gym in the mornings and the rest of the day I'm parked in front of my computer or on the phone. Thank you for being a good example!

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